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_____ .::Jane::.__

_

Jane is a very close friend of mine, someone who I love dearly. However, due to years of abuse she is not able to fulfil her full potential, she is left struggling for life, with too much pain to describe. Despite this she is still one of the most beautiful people I know, and she still has the power to *laugh*!! I cannot say more as this may be rude of me, although I asked her permission to make this page. Instead I have included some of her poems below:

Fear of the feast, fear of the fast.

Fear is my food, scared it won't last.

Delirious panic, starved of need,

Suppressed desire, but my way to succeed.

Shaky and ravenous, the art of resistance.

Denying myself has become my existence.

Mouth frozen agape I just want to eat

But fear grasps my throat, can't admit defeat.

This envious interest eats me to the core,

Chews my flesh slowly , puts its hand out for more.

It thrives on achievement, the need to control.

How well I resist becomes my next goal.

How little I need the focus of each day.

Perfection achieved when nothing left to take away.

******

FANTASY OF STRUGGLE

Can you picture a soul being trapped to the ground

All alone, no one around, quiet without a sound?

can you imagine one star trying to shine in a dark sky

Just one little star just visible to the human eye?

Can you visualise a flower trying to push through the concrete

Not knowing what is above or what it might meet?

Can you picture a person trapped within four walls?

The time goes by, they become withdrawn - wondering the cause.

Though everyone can close their eyes and imagine such a thing

They still don't get the idea until they've lived such a thing.

******

This little girl she's far too good

Acting as she always should.

She wears a smile, she's neat and clean.

This is how she feels she should be seen.

But no-one sees her heart where she -

Is locked away and can't get free.

Her secret thoughts she can't admit,

She's bound to feel a hypocrite.

She grows in body and in mind.

But her secret thoughts are left behind.

Her smile is false, cold as frost.

She doesn't realise how much she is lost.

Her secret thoughts were of life and fire,

Without it she has no desire -

For anything except to please.

Is there hope for little girls like these.

They act exactly as they ought,

But no one shares their secret thought.